Hey y’all! My newest chapbook “Conjuring Her”, which is set for release later this month, is offically available for preorder! Make sure to get your copy today!
Ps: I’m looking for reviewers, so if you’re interested in writing a review of “Conjuring Her” shoot me an email at email@example.com.
I thought he just went to the bathroom,
but he never came back,
so I switched out my nametag with his
and tried to grow a mustache,
but I didn’t have enough authority
and ended up crying under a table
until he texted me saying
“be an adult, and I’ll buy you a beer.”
I tried to pet a pigeon at a park in Dallas,
but it appropriately told me to fuck off,
so I wrote a poem about how pretty it was
and how I wished I could be a pigeon
cause pigeons don’t have to worry
about if their poetry is good enough to be read by other pigeons
since pigeons don’t read poetry.
Pigeons don’t have to worry about anything but
telling poets to fuck off
when they start writing poems about trying to pet pigeons at parks.
and she just shook her head,
saying she was a virgin
in sex and medicine,
and that her body was a temple
for the carnivores
who’d suckled her on plastic udders
in place of the mother who’d abandoned her.
because a cow who can speak English
doesn’t want to live
and I don’t blame him,
so I took my own depression medication
and wore my sunglasses
to his funeral at the processing plant,
so that the hamburgers wouldn’t see me cry
How can I be an English major?
A senior in a black bra made me a screwdriver
that tasted like furniture polish,
and I doubled over crying
because I’d forgotten that…continue reading over at the Camel Saloon.
At a gas station in Alabama
I stopped to buy a toothbrush,
so I could kiss my girlfriend,
but the cashier couldn’t stop
contemplating my sex life,
and the man filling up his truck outside was
examining his new shotgun,
so I began thinking about…continue reading over at The Camel Saloon.