A letter to the brother I haven’t seen since freshman year on graduating high school

Davis

Dear Davis,

I graduated yesterday. Your big sister is a graduate, can you believe it? Gods, I never thought I would make it to that stage. I figured I would’ve died in some cataclysmic event by now. You know, like the meteor the wiped out the dinos? I always thought something like that was going to happen to me.

It still doesn’t feel real, now. I woke up today thinking I was late to school, and that my art teacher, Gasper, was gonna kill me for skipping first period. It’s funny thinking I’m never going to go back to his class, or to my newspaper class, or my AP spanish class. I’m more than likely never going to see half of my classmates again or even my teachers. I’ll never run through the halls, trying to maneuver through the massive teenage mob that always clogged the walls before the bell rang.

Of course, next school year I will probably still have to run to class to avoid being late considering my sleeping habits. I am excited, though, to run across Salem’s campus and go to to class. I’m not even an official student there yet, but I already have fallen in love with the school. I bet you would like it there. There are plenty of wide open spaces for you to toddle around in and adventures for you to have. I wish I could show you it.

You should be starting school soon. You’ll be turning five this summer, after-all. It’s funny, as soon as one of us gets out of school, the other goes in. I wonder what you will be like on that first day of school. Will you be nervous and quiet like I was? Maybe you’ll be loud and outgoing. I could see you being everybody’s friend.

I kind of picture you like Forest Gump and Jenny’s son, sitting there waiting for the bus with your hair all combed and shirt buttoned to your neck. I hope you know that I’ll be waiting there with you. Of course, I won’t actually be there, but I’ll be waiting there in spirit. I always am with you in your heart.

Did you know that you were with me when I graduated? No, I didn’t kidnap you and hide you in the stands to watch me get my diploma. Rather, I carried a picture of you in the locket mom and dad (your Uncle KC, remember him?) got me as a graduation present. I used that old picture of you when you were about one sitting outside the hotdog place with the tarheel hat pulled almost over your eyes. I’d ask you if you remember that, but you were so little that’d be about impossible.

I wish you did, though. That was a happy day.

I miss those happy days.

I miss you, Davis.

I still have that necklace on. I only took it off to shower today. For so long it felt like you were missing, but now, with this, I feel just a little closer to you. I hope you feel a little closer to me too.

I love you, little kola bear.

Your big sister,
Em

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